Here are some questions I am frequently asked.
1) "How do you increase the amount of banana peel given to you?"
"Given to you?" I will not accept peel as handouts! I only eat peel I can steal unnoticed that is set down somewhere. I only like the peel of forbidden fruit. And when you steal it, you get the WHOLE peel and not some puny little piece.
Personally, I hold out for Low Salt Wheat Thins. I have been trying to use my Nigerian Mind Trick on Michelle to guide her to giving us Wheat Thins, but she is not as susceptible as dad is. Nigerian mind tricks only work on the weak minded. But Michelle does bring us Animal Crackers and EVERYONE loves them! Even the few goats that do not like peel for whatever reason LOVE Animal Crackers.
But back to the question... I recommend attaining "Most Favored Goat Status." Everyone gets peel sometimes, but when you attain MFGS, you get more pieces and more frequently.
2) "So how do I get on the MFGS list?"
There are many ways to increase your standing on the MFGS list...
Be 14 oz when you were kidded and have to live in the house because it is too cold for you to live outside with your mom.
Be the runt of your kidding.
Be cute.
Be a low goat on the pecking list or have a health issue..
Be shy and then become friendly. This even works if it happens halfway thru your pregnancy when you think, "Hmmm... this guy could be of use to me sometime in my recent future."
Be a good momma. Or "Most Improved Momma". Bonus points for being G.O.A.T. for your first freshening.
Be a momma that is willing to adopt a kid.
Be a wether that is stationed to live with a buck and have to put up with all of the buck's "attention".
Be a good buck that treats his does nicely.
Be a buck that smells of Aspen Fir. (They all smell like that to dad. Not so much to anyone else.)
Be clever at opening things so long as you do not abuse it too much, Skeeter can open his stall latch but never does that when dad goes in to feed Snowball his grain. Lukey can open the door to the Wethermahal pen but does not mess with the deadbolt. If dad forgets to apply the deadbolt, that is on him! No demerits to Lukey!
Game the system of getting treats like dodging from one end of the line to the other when dad is passing out pellets thru the stall slat.
Love to be pet so much that you stop eating so you can focus on the pets.
Love to be pet so much that you will leave your food to ask for a pet.
Run up under dad's legs for attention when he is sitting on a folding chair.
Rub your head on dad's leg showing affection.
Walk up and wrap your neck around the neck of a visiting tired, crying 2 year old boy and give him a hug to make him feel better.
As you see there are many ways and there are even more, so everyone that wants peel ends up on the list one way or another.
There are also things to avoid. These could take you off the list...
Do not try to jamb your head into dad's pants pockets to serve yourself peel.
Do not try to rip his pocket open with your teeth.
DO NOT head butt someone into dad's legs when he is passing out peel.
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